Tuesday, August 30, 2005


I've had a bowl of frosted flakes and a Diet Coke this morning and I still can't wake up. And that's sad because I got up at 6:30 and it's now 10:40. This is how bad it is - when Cute Baby laid down for his morning nap, I turned on the TV, put Chan at one end of the couch and Kady at the other. I put one of my feet in Kady's lap and one of my hands on Chan's leg. Then I went to sleep. I figured that if they moved or tried to get up so they could set the house on fire or go eat crayons, I'd feel them move and I'd wake up. The poor kids were so dumbfounded that their mom/sitter was passed out cold on the sofa at 9am that they sat stock still for the 35 minutes I was unconscious. I feel awful that I had to do that, but man, I needed it. I actually need more. But now Cute Baby is up and out of the very safe refuge of the playpen and therefore, I must now remain upright and conscious. He eats things. Things that aren't meant to be eaten. Like ponytail holders, lint and stale Coco Puffs that I have no idea where they come from, I just swept, for cryin' out loud.

I know why I'm like this - I should be starting my period soon. For some of you that will be filed directly into your Redneck Diva TMI file and that's okay. But I just felt like I needed to explain my extreme need for sleep today. So you wouldn't think I was a crack ho or something and that I had just pulled an all-night corner walk while smoking and snorting things that might possibly be illegal. Because I'm not and I didn't.


Last night was Ladies' Night. April won money. I'm sure at one point I knew how much she won, but for some reason the amount is escaping me this morning. But anyway, gooooooooooooo April!! Woot. Yeah.


My youngest child has Chandler in a headlock and is saying "Come ON, suckah! You think you can defeat me? You are WRONG, suckah!!" I have no idea where she gets it.


I really need to go to Mrs. Coach's office to get my Free Cheese. I do believe I was double dog dared to go in my pajamas and whaddya know I am still in my pajamas, but for some reason the thought of loading these children into the van and driving to town just makes me kind of nauseous right now.


Last night when Jill picked up Chan, she found her son sitting in my darkened living room next to my husband who was playing Kill Zone on PS2. I was sitting at the table writing checks to Scholastic Book Club so my kids' classrooms can get free books when I order every month. She said, "Uhh...well, it's kind of dark in here, huh?" Without looking up from the check I was writing I said, "Yeah. Your son is getting his daily dose of gratuitous bloody violence. I'm pretty sorry about that. Blame my husband. I told him to turn it off while there was a child NOT related to us in the house, but he won't listen." And all the while Chan's over there going "Yeah! Ooh you got 'im, Uncle Pa-Paul! Yesssssssss!" I'm fairly sure she can't wait till he's enrolled in public Pre-K next year.


Speaking of enrolling - I spoke with the lady in charge of Lab School this morning. Kady and Chandler will start in a mere 4 weeks.

Let me explain - Lab School is the Child Development Lab at the local college. College students enrolled in Early Childhood Ed, Child Development, etc and are required to do a lab can take this class. The school has a teacher and an aide, but the college students also go into the school and help, observe and interact with the kids. The 3-year-old program is Tuesday/Thursday for two hours a session. The 4-year-old program is Monday/Wednesday/Friday for two hours a session. It's entirely a play to learn cirriculum and I've never seen a child NOT thrive in the school. It lets them get used to an organized school-type setting, but in a very relaxed way.

Four weeks till my baby spends time away from me with someone who is not related to her for two whole hours at a time!! I feel kind of woozy when I think about it.

In the meantime, though, Kady is so excited she can hardly stand it. Every day she asks if she and Chandler can go to school today. I think I'm going to make a paper chain with a link for every day until school starts. We can take one off every day and then maybe she can focus on the chain and not driving her mother up the wall with the continual asking.


I think I'm going to go make some coffee. Ugh. It's now 11:20am. I'm still in my pajamas and I'm still tired.



Queen Of Cheese said...

When you come in could you bring me some of the coffee you just made. I think my eyes closed twice while reading your post. It wasn't boring, I'm just sleepy. Thanks!

~ A P R I L ~ said...

Hon, you're tired cause you were at the casino until at least 11:30 last night, probably later!!

I triple dog dare you to go for free cheese in your jammies now. LOL

Please, do take Mrs. Coach some coffee, me thinks she needs it.

Oh, and I won $30 last night but I really didn't win it, I walked in with $15 and left with $10, or was it $15, I dunno...... either way, I'm still a big loser when you look at how many BIG winners there were last night! I saw a $4,500 jackpot as well as a $7,800 one!
I'm not complaining about my $30 wind fall mind you, I just don't consider it really winning when it just helps me break even. LOL

Sam said...

I am so tired and my work day is only 1/2 over. Two clients down, two to go. Ug. I wanna nap soo bad. I've done the whole "put body part on kid and then nap thing" a bunch of times. Time-honored mommy tradition I believe.

Redneck Diva said...

Mrs.Coach-I'll be in first thing in the morning. With coffee. And a whole shitload of children, so start Xeroxing those color sheets. Okay, so it's only three kids, but it sure seems like a shitload sometimes.

April-I stay out till midnight EVERY Monday night and NEVER feel like I do today!! It's just been a shitty-ass day.

Hey, at least you broke even last night - I left $40 in the hole. Yeesh.

Sam-Okay, so I'm not the only one who's laid on my children while I've napped. Whew. I was really putting myself out there by writing it, I was afraid. I guess we all just get desperate at times.

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