Friday, August 19, 2005

Deep freakin' thoughts

What's the sound of two babies sleeping?

Boring as hell.

Cute Little Baby's mom din't say nothin' 'bout her baby takin' no morning nap (got all gangsta on ya, how'd ya like that?) so I wasn't going to attempt one, but when he started fussing awhile ago and I picked him up and he laid his head on my chest and sighed really big and then fell promptly asleep, I'm thinking he needed one.

Cute Big Baby didn't fight a nap either. He curled up on my chest, patted my arm, sighed real big and went to sleep.

It's the boobs. Mother Nature's pillows.

When Sam was about two or so he had this habit of pinching and squeezing and rubbing my boobs, especially my left one. I'd swing him up onto my left hip and he'd immediately put his hand on my boob. At first I didn't say anything, I'd just move his hand. Sometimes several times. So finally one day I said, "Look. Sammy. Honey. You really shouldn't play with mommy's boobs like that. It's just not right!" And he grinned, put his hand back up on it, rubbed and poked at it and very sweetly said, "But they're. just. so. squishy!"

Well, you can't argue with that.

He also had a thing for Magnet Lady's boobs. Heck, he still does. He'll be 7 in a few months. I'm thinkin' he's gonna be a boob man someday. Gosh, he's going to be SO disappointed when she gets her breast reduction!!

Okay, I'm gonna go make some noise and try to wake up a couple of babies. It's getting boring around here! The two three-year-olds don't want me to play with them. They're kind of clique-y that way.


~ A P R I L ~ said...

Big Cute Baby, Little Cute Baby, damn, I need to come to your house!! Are these Cute Babies on clearance at Wal*Mart or what?

Redneck Diva said...

Jennifer-It's part of the magic of Diva Daycare. I don't know why kids like my chest - just squishy enough I guess! Personally I think the little guy was just worn out from all the excitement! There was SO much goin on here - he was worn out from trying to process it all!

Sam-I only have boobs when I'm fat. When I was skinny I was pitifully flat-chested. That's why I have such mixed emotions about losing weight - healthy or big tatas? Hmmm...

April-If only they were on clearance. The EveryDayLowPrice runs somewhere around $3000 these days to get a new, unused model. :)

We....the people

Originally published in The Miami News-Record, July 2020 Everything is different now. I’m not just talking about masks and social distancing...