Monday, September 12, 2005

And it was Monday once more in the great land of poopy diapers

Today was Cute Little Baby's first official day in my care for all of time, forever and ever amen. Or at least until his parents take him somewhere else. And he's still one of the cutest babies ever. I have two of the cutest babies in my care right now!! Cute Big Baby is big and fat and funny and then Cute Little Baby is easy-going, precious, smiley and when you pick him up he just fits so well right in your arms . . . this was one of those days where I really loved my job.

Chan and Kady and I made placemats this morning. Because you know I got a new dining room table that I love and want to marry, right? So in order to protect the top, the kids and I made placemats for them. I drew their names all cool on cardstock and colored the letters all bright and cheery and then they decorated the paper with stickers and shapes. Then we enclosed the entire shebang in clear Con-tac paper, which to any day care provider is like clear plastic gold. They turned out really cute and gave me some good bonding time with the big kids while the little ones napped. Chan was really upset when he was told he couldn't take it home with him tonight. So craft time is taken care of tomorrow - he wants to make one for his table now. I also let him pick out a special book to leave in his cubby overnight so that we can read it first thing in the morning. Bribery works well with 3-year-olds. Looks like my morning is going to start off with coffee and a story about a polar bear. Which is how every Tuesday morning should start, really.

This morning when I got up there was a frog in my kitchen sink. Imagine my surprise at finding that. Not sure how the little bugger got in there, but he got out when Mr. Diva captured his little green froggy butt and threw him outside. He was just a little tree frog, but still. Ew.

I need to get started on our class reunion. Fifteen years. I am shocked that nearly fifteen whole years have passed since we graduated high school. When the ten year reunion was over I swore I'd never plan another one, but here I am, five years later, getting ready to plan another one. At least I'm not pregnant this time - that was awful. If I don't plan it, though, I'm not sure anyone else will. Not that I'm better than anyone else at planning them, I just don't think anyone will do it. I saw one of the guys I was pretty close to our Senior year at the Buffalo Saturday night. He said that another guy we went to school with was playing golf at his golf-y type place (I guess they call them courses?) on Sunday and that the guy had mentioned something was up at a reunion site. Both of them just assumed it was me - and I wasn't even a Senior class officer! I'm just a nerd with a penchant for organization. Thing was, I hadn't planned anything yet. So in my curiosity to find out who had taken on the big fifteen year shindig I checked out tonight. Well, evidently it's left over from the ten year reunion because I found nothing new on the site. Of course, if you want to dig around and read all the dirt on your former classmates and what's going on, you have to shell out money and I'm just not sure I want to do that. If I'm going to plan a reunion I guess I should, but the thing is, unless everyone else shells out the money, it won't do any good for me to shell out the money because you have to shell out the money to freakin' read anything at the site. Gr.

I'm thinking I'll start a reunion blog and then start spreading the word and see how fast news travels.

Wednesday Abby and Sam have eye doctor appointments. I will be taking my three daycare kids and my three kids to the eye doctor. Plus, Sis' kids have appointments right before my kids'. That office will never be the same again. In fact, they may ask us to find another doctor altogether.

I forgot to mention that I got things lined out with Sam's teacher and his AR problem. Turns out the kid had checked out a book that was WAY harder than he ever should've at this point in the year. AND he's not remedial. That was a whole misunderstood, confusing, clusterfucked thing. Now, she might've just been blowing smoke up my ass because I'd called her at home and was voicing my concerns, but she says that he's one of the top students in the class. She said he's just like Abby was in first grade, except a lot more social. She apologized for not monitoring the books they check out better and told me to show him how to find out the level himself and then it wouldn't happen again if he took on the responsiblity himself. (Hmm...shouldn't she have done that?) She also said he wouldn't have to test on that particular book just yet and he wouldn't have to miss recess over it. At least I didn't have to bus' a cap in her ass.

Mr. Diva grilled steaks tonight. That was yummy.

We rode the 4-wheelers tonight. And on the way home went through the field. The grass is really high out there and I discovered that if you drive really fast through that grass and have your mouth open doing a Duke of Hazzard "YEEEEEEEEEE HAWWWWWWWW" that you will get lots of seeds in your mouth.

Yesterday at my Home and Garden Party, one of my friends from my old Pampered Chef days came and showed off her new engagement ring and told how they're running off to - I think - the Bahamas to get married. I am SO happy for her and she looks so happy. She met this guy on the internet and they could like, be on a commercial, I swear. It was online dating nirvana, I'm telling you. So after she left, Mom made a snarky comment about being single and lonely or something like that. I nudged her and said, "Well, you know Lisa met her fiance on the internet. Maybe you should try it out." She said, "Yeah, well I just hope she doesn't end up chopped up in a 55-gallon barrel before it's all over with." Of course, April and Mrs. Coach laughed and several others who read the blog laughed, then Mom said, "Of course, as tiny as Lisa is, it'd only take a 10-gallon barrel for her."

On our girls' night out awhile back, we joked that it might possibly take more than one 55-gallon barrel for us and how embarrassing would THAT be!? The police would be interviewed by the news reporter and the detective would say "Well, we found the victim's remains in that barrel right there. And that one over there . . . and there's another behind the barn . . . and we think that might be more of her over yonder . . ." Yeah, what a way to go out.

Mr. Diva went back to work today. I don't guess I'll have to kill him after all. Not once today was there a mayonnaise-laden knife on my counter top or a glass sweating on an end table. Ahh . . . peace at last.


Queen Of Cheese said...

I think your mother is waiting till she's found a man who is charming, funny, and 110 and on a ventilator so she can his retirement check without actually having to work at it! That is a plan that just might work!!!! Smart woman!

~ A P R I L ~ said...

Hey, just cause I stopped blogging doesn't mean YOU have to too! WTF? Get busy woman!

Oh, you might wanna read my blog, I updated it, just for you.

We....the people

Originally published in The Miami News-Record, July 2020 Everything is different now. I’m not just talking about masks and social distancing...