Monday, May 16, 2005

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!! I hear he's also a fan of pineapple tidbits, which is a recurring theme on my blog. The tidbits, not the pineapple. Although, as I've said before, you just can't say tidbits without thinking of pineapple.

Friday was Momma/Kady Day. We did absolutely nothing. Well, I guess we did something - we hung out in our pj's and watched so many cartoons and movies that I think we were both precariously close to flatlining by afternoon. But it was nice. We "nuggled" a lot and I love 'nuggling with that kid. She's really good at it. Friday evening was karate, then we picked up pizzas and then my family came out here for dinner. Sis and Bub got some really crummy news on the house they are buying and Mom thought everyone needed to divert their attention from that. We ate and then tried to find a sitter so we could all go out, but Super Babysitter was at a rodeo, so we just stayed here. Mom offered to watch them all, but we wanted her to go, too. We watched TV, a little VH1, a little Discovery and then Sis and I realized that everyone was asleep but us. Mom was snoring in the floor, Bub was snoring in the big chair, Mr. Diva was snoring in the recliner, all three of my children were sound asleep in their beds. We put Sis' kids in my room to watch Veggie Tales and keep quiet so as not to roust around the blissfully snoozing others. Then I looked over and Sis was asleep. I have one rowdy family, don't I?



We drove by the fairgrounds and the kids saw vendor trailers and junk cars and immediately a chorus rose up from the backseat, "Mom! What's going on at the fairgrounds and whatever it is CAN WE GO?????" I had heard a commercial for the event earlier on the radio and as soon as I started forming the word "Monster" they began cheering. Except Kady. She goes, "Ewww, I don't wanna go to da monstah twucks!" I said, "You don't? Well, okay, I can see if Gram can watch you, babe." Then she cocked her head over to one side and said, "Wait. Do YOU wanna go see da monstah twucks, Momma?" I said, "Well, heck yeah, princess! I love the monster trucks!" She had a change of heart, crossed her arms and said, "Well, then if Momma wants ta go to da monstah twucks, den I wanna go to da monstah twucks." She'll become redneck like the rest of us yet.


Saturday night we actually managed to leave our house. Mr. Diva had to work, then of course came home to mess around with that stupid playhouse, so while he did that I fed and bathed the kids. We dropped them at Mom's around 9:30, then headed to the Buffalo. Mr. Diva handed me a twenty and said that was it. I pouted, but hey, what could I do - I had no cash on me. We headed for the slots and I was searching for a quarter Lucky Ducky machine. I finally found one, so he sat down beside me to play a Star Spangled Sevens game. I was doing eh, okay. Just staying pretty steady, winning, losing, blah blah blah. He lost a ten but wasn't done. All he had in his wallet was a fifty so I said, "Put it in, but set a limit and don't play below that limit." He put in that fifty, hit the button 3 or 4 times and won $694. That's sheetrock for the playhouse money!!! The lucky shit. So I followed him up to cash out and when the cashier laid his money out on the counter, I snatched a hundred dollar bill off of there like lightning. He wasn't happy, but oh well. He knew we had a night at home with no kids - it was either give me the hundred or waste a good opportunity for really loud The Kids Are Out Of The House Sex. I kept the hundred.


We bought the paint for the bathroom last night! The plan was to paint it this morning, then he could mess around with the playhouse in the afternoon when Mark got off work. But he just got up 45 minutes ago. It's 12:45. Yeah. He slept 13 hours. I'd ache all over if I slept that long. He told me to clean out the bathroom and get it ready and he'd help me until Mark gets here. I bet I get an hour out of him at the most. Grr. If I weren't so doggone short it'd be one thing, but I really need him to paint the ceiling and the top of the walls! I can handle the wainscoting and the cabinet, but there's just only so much a short girl can do on her own.


Well, I'm tidbitted out now, so I'm off to paint! I may end up posting pictures of a bathroom that has fresh paint up about five and a half feet. I'll be so glad when that playhouse is done. . .

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Originally published in The Miami News-Record, July 2020 Everything is different now. I’m not just talking about masks and social distancing...