Thursday, September 06, 2007

Blogging at work

It is 30 minutes until my Macro class starts. I am sitting in my college boss's office at her big fancy desk, typing on her computer, eating a turkey and cheese sandwich that I'm wondering if the Miracle Whip was still safe and edible, but no matter now because 2/3 of it is in my belly right now, popping a grape or two in my face every now and then, too, which is weird because I don't really like grapes, but they sort of sounded good this morning for some reason, and while I'm doing all that, I'm successfully typing one of the longest runon sentences ever. If only I'd had a preposition to end it with.

I normally don't eat before my night class, so now that I've eaten 2/3 of a sandwich and some grapes it's a sure bet that I'm going to have to poop during class. It's Murphy's Law of the Bowel.

Today at my DHS job I got to schmooze a gal at the Social Security office. I like schmoozing. The caseworker I did the schmoozing for was impressed and called me her favorite little liar.

I had to buy a scantron for the first time in my life today. We have a test in Macro next week and we have to use scantrons to answer. For those of you not in the know, scantrons are little pieces of paper with the little circles on them that you get to fill in with a #2 pencil just like when you were in elementary school when they asked you the question about the train that left Cinncinnatti at 2:32pm and the other train that left Albuquerque at 1:54 pm and then they wanted you to figure out when the two trains would collide thus causing mass casualties and what you really did, rather than figure out when the collision would occur, you just played connect the dot with the little dots on your answer sheet or you spelled your name by coloring in the appropriate dots and oh my gosh, another runon sentence. Anyway, I bought a scantron today. Actually I bought ten. Why did I buy ten? Because the mother in me thought that there might be some young whippersnapper in the class next week who partied too hard the night before and forgot to go to the bookstore to buy their own and I will be the old married lady in class who will pass out scantrons to anyone who needs one. And possibly knitted sweaters and homemade oatmeal cookies. Gosh, I'm old.

Okay, time to go to class. Actually it's still 23 minutes away, but the class is up two flights of stairs and I need extra time before anyone else gets into the classroom so I can stop huffing and puffing. Because I'm not only old, I'm fat.

Tomorrow's my day off. I think I need it. Hopefully I can go the entire day without one runon sentence. I'll be doing Algebra, so I don't think there's a real big risk there anyway.

6 comments:

Going Like Sixty said...

IwishIcouldmakealongrunonsentence likeyoudobecausethenIcouldtell you"you'reskinny"andnotseemlike I'myourfavoritelittle(see?sheagrees)liar,whichIlikealot betterthanbeingasuckuporbrown noser with.

Anonymous said...

happy day off!

M&Co. said...

Good luck on the test!

You wanna talk old? I went to college so long ago, that if the professor used the scantron, they had to give them to us!

Stewed Hamm said...

The best part about Economics class is that when people forget Scantrons on test day, you can sell your extras in class... and nobody can say a damn thing about it, because you're just obeying the law of supply and demand.

Anna said...

You had never had to buy a scantron before!? Really? Shit - I am surprised that my husband doesn't make me use them NOW - for what I have no idea, but I am still surprised.

And for the record run on sentences aren't bad in my opinion because you still get your point across even if you don't use punctuation and it still makes sense to a degree even though somewhere someone is probably annoyed you haven't typed a period here or a question mark there but what does that really matter if you still make sense and just don't stop typing like you should since it's not like you are a terrorist or something evil and you arent' trying to harm anyone by not finishing your sentence you just have alot to say and that doesn't mean you are friend with Osama Bin Laden and trying to help him bring on the downfall of Western society just because you don't puntuate or take a breath or anything when you are expressing yourself through the written word and stuff it jsut means you have a great deal on your mind and want to get it out there man just out there for all the world to see and to hell with punctuation and purpose if it gets your point across even if it DOES piss people off and it makes them think you and Osama Bin Laden golf on the weekends. You know?

Queen Of Cheese said...

!!!????,,,,......"""":::::;;;;;!!!??()!!!!






Didn't have anything to say, thought I'd give you punctuation instead.

We....the people

Originally published in The Miami News-Record, July 2020 Everything is different now. I’m not just talking about masks and social distancing...