30 minutes until class. I've got killer, nuclear, monster butterflies. I'm so silly that way - the test is over, yet I'm still nervous. Go figure.
I'm considering buying Stewed Hamm a plane ticket and taking him to one of my Macro classes so he can see WHY the entire class is clueless. Maybe it's just us, maybe it's Economics in general. Either way, I want Stewed Hamm to go to class with me. I'd buy him a beer afterwards, too.
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I got new arm and ankle bling today to go with the new bling on my glasses. I am blingalicious. And because I think would be Fergie if I could, I will spell it for you.
B-l-i-n-g-a-l-i-c-i-o-u-s
You're welcome.
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A little over one week to go until the Okie Blogger Round-up! I'm getting so excited!
The other night we were sitting in my living room discussing the upcoming event. Tater said, "Well, I just want you all to know, I'm wearing a boobie shirt. Just in case there is some single Oklahoma blogger there." I told her I thought that was a good call.
Paul, not to be left out of the conversation, said, "Okay, and I'll wear my penis pants! You know, just in case......well.....just in case."
I don't think it'd be possible to love him any more than I do right now.
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Today at lunch there were 8 of us ladies sitting around the table at the Mexican restaurant. The conversation turned to TV shows and everyone started talking about a show they'd watched last night. It was a crime show, not a clue what it was. They also discusssed a new one called "Life" on NBC. I sat there quietly eating my chicken nachos el charro while they lamented over a particular character leaving and how someone was going to commit suicide. Finally I said, "Yeah, and I can't WAIT for the premier of Cavemen next week."
Crickets chirped. 14 eyes looked upon me as if I'd sprouted my very own cavemen right out of my right breast. And they think they can make a social worker outta me. It is very clear that by my television watching preferences alone, I am not cut out for a career in social work.
I want to be entertained by laughing at my television programming. Folks, I have so little time for TV these days, I make sure that what I watch is going to make me chuckle, laugh or even snort. Watching the characters blacklight for semen and scrape brains off of bedspreads doesn't make me snort. Like watching Wayne Newton dance - THAT made me snort. And kind of feel a little bad for him, too.
Although.... I doubt Cavemen is going to make me snort, but I'm willing to give it a try.
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Every day someone in my bulk mail folder asks me if I'm satisfied with the size of my manhood and every day I stop and think, "Yes. Yes, I am. My penis is just fine, thanks."
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Benjamin Franklin is bor-ring.
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I'm still with Fred.
I was born a semi-diva. I married a redneck. Through the magic of osmosis or just because of a serious lack of sophistication over the years I have found a balance of the two that make me who I am today. And then I write about it all, much to the chagrin of my mother.
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We....the people
Originally published in The Miami News-Record, July 2020 Everything is different now. I’m not just talking about masks and social distancing...
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4 comments:
Holy smokes, I think I'm with Fred, too. Until today, I didn't know much about him, other than that I loved him in The Hunt For Red October.
"This business will get out of hand. It will get out of hand and we'll be lucky to live through it."
Anyway, i just checked out his website, and I have to say that I agree with everything I see there. Yay!
You're looking forward to Cavemen? You know, I try really hard not to judge others for their viewing choices because, well, my own are often so bizarre and out there that it wouldn't be fair of me to apply my weirdo standards to normal folk but . . . Cavemen? The show that pretty much every critic agrees has failed to capture even a fraction of the humor of the only-mildly-amusing commercials that inspired it? The mind wobbles.
Then again, I found Bubble Boy and Kung-Pow: Enter the Fist to be hilarious, so what do I know?
I'm making Da Man come with me to Okie Blogger Round-up as well. I'm sooo glad it's at a pizza and beer place or I might not have had too much luck getting him there.
Caveman??? Really? No. Probably no chuckles to be found there.
Last night though I watched It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia and once I got past the fact that it's totally twisted, there were several good chuckles for me there.
Remember back in the 90s when Saturday Night Live was flushed with pride at the success of the Wayne's World movie, and they started shoving movie deals at every half-baked sketch they had ever written? Yeah, Cavemen is like that... only instead of having to fill 90 short minutes with funny, they have an entire season of network TV to wring out of that turnip.
It'll be gone by Thanksgiving.
On the other hand, Earl and The Office were great this week. And I only board planes that have been certified Snake-free.
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