Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Don't engage the crazy lady. It only makes her worse.

Yesterday JackJack was lying in the Boppy in the floor and I was leaned down over him, talking baby talk to him in an effort to elicit some kind of grin/coo/giggle from him. It was working and he and I were having a most wonderful conversation about the intricacies of life and how much money we saved on our car insurance by switching to Geico. Little Nicky came over and started attempting to climb on my back and pretend I was a pony, an occupational hazard of mine. I gently coerced him down - because my stirrups were in the wash and it's hard to pretend you're a pony without stirrups, you know - and said, "Look, there's Jack. Say 'Hi, Jack.'"

Then I spent the next 10 minutes laughing at myself for getting so tickled over the phrase "Hi, Jack". Jen's darling big kids were here and her girl kind of looked at me funny, cocked her head to one side and then broke eye contact, probably for fear that the hysteria was catching. I said, "But don't you get it? Hijack. Hijack! Like a plane. You hijack a plane! Don't you get it?" She looked back down at her book, but not before getting this uncomfortable look on her face, kind of like when you're at a nursing home and a little old lady you don't know comes up and tries to convince you that you are her dashing young WWII soldier boyfriend just back from the war. You just smile and act polite and look for the nearest exit. That poor kid handled it well and just quietly said, "I get it, Miss Kristin. I get it."

5 comments:

MrsCoach2U said...

I bet she can't wait to get back to school!

cedric-the-destroyer said...

How do you feel knowing you're going to be the crazy sitter they talk about when they get older? Mine was Lottie. Horrible, horrible woman...

Redneck Diva said...

Mrs.Coach, I'm sure she was never so glad to see her normal, lucid teacher today!

Cedric, but I don't want to be Kiki the horrible, insane babysitter! I want to be Kiki the babysitter who let us eat spaghetti with our hands and ride her like a pony and showed us all of her best hide n seek hiding spots, and introduced us to the best vodka money can buy. That's the kind of sitter I want to be!!

Jennifer said...

Kiki is the best in the world she makes homemade OREO's!!! My kids adore you and you very well know that... Mrs. Coach - she was thrilled to go back to school :) oh uh, Diva? I usually get that look and that phrase from her, we are working on it. Now where did my manual on 9 year old girls go? Can I borrow yours????

Redneck Diva said...

Jen, my homemade Oreos will make me famous someday.

She wasn't disrespectful at all, just very, very scared. :)

And if I had a manual, trust me, I'd be doing much better than I am. As it is right now, I'm just kind of muddle through and hope I'm not scarring her for life.