Sunday, October 22, 2006

That explains it

Phone call from my mother in law Wednesday morning after the whole Jake debacle -

Martha: I'm sorry to bother you. I know you're kind of upset over Jake right now.

Me: Eh, I'm okay. I'm just pissed off. What'd you need?

Martha: Well, I just got to thinking....maybe we should have a laying-on of hands for ol' Jake. I mean, he's got a spirit of thievery in him and we need to cast out that demon!



Martha: (Laughs hysterically)

Me: (Joins in laughing hysterically. I was worried for a few minutes.)

Martha: Really, though, Kristin. I know why he did it. He's a male and he's frustrated. Paul told me that their dog was in the stock trailer, so of course he was frustrated! I mean, he's a male. He has needs. I guess it'd be only natural that if you're horny and you can't get to what it is you're wanting, you'd chew up a lawnmower seat.

Me: Ya know, now that you mention it.....that explains it.

Martha: What?

Me: I wondered why Paul was out in the barn chewing on the tractor seat the other night. Now I know.


Kellyology said...


Stewed Hamm said...

Careful cazzie, or someone will take you up on your offer. ^_^

We....the people

Originally published in The Miami News-Record, July 2020 Everything is different now. I’m not just talking about masks and social distancing...