Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Urgent Vacation

This will be the title of the next National Lampoon's "Vacation" movie - Urgent Branson Vacation. And the Diva family will be starring in it. Because we can't do a vacation without some kind of drama occuring.


Thursday evening the kids and I went down to Tater's Farmette to have birthday cake for TotOne's birthday.

While we were there Abby stepped on something and got a couple of splinters in her foot. Being a normal parent (relatively so) I did what any normal parent would do - I got a needle and tried to get them out. I got one, but the other was in just too durn deep. So after making her cry I decided to leave it alone. Then Friday evening it was still bothering her, so Mom took the needle and tried to get it out. She couldn't get it either. I put some drawing salve on it and put her to bed. Within 30 minutes she was crying that it hurt worse and she couldn't sleep. I gave her some Motrin and put her back to bed, thinking she was just tired.

Saturday morning we got up and around and started getting ready to leave for Branson. She said it was sore, but not too bad. She seemed fine to me - a little whiny, but she's always nervous before we travel.

We drove on in to Branson, got our motel room and then headed over to Celebration City. Abby was walking on her toes, but I figured it was because her heel was sore. It certainly wasn't enough to keep her from going bezerkers out of sheer glee at the amusement park and enjoying the sweltering 100 degree temps like the rest of us.

Vacation isn't complete without a gigantic pink feline and some talking mutant vegetables. (If you look closely, you can see she's favoring that right foot in the pictures.)

We left the amusement park a little before 10 that night and went back to the motel for a swim. You know how much I loathe love water. Yay. We really did have a good time. Kady has mastered the art of putting her face in the water, which is a big gigantic feat for her, so she practiced that a lot while the other three practiced splashing me in the face and making me squeal.

We put three very exhausted kids to bed around midnight and then we collapsed into a dehydrated sleep on a horrible motel bed.

The next morning we stumbled to the breakfast room of the motel and Abby said, "Mom, you're gonna wanna take a look at my foot," and started to stick it up on the table. I nearly spit donut all over the table as I hissed, "Git yore foot offa that table, girl! No one wants to see your ol' foot at breakfast!" I told her I'd take a look at it back up in the room. I had no idea what awaited me in that motel room.

And trust me when I say, that picture just doesn't do it justice. It looked so much worse in person.

I called Mom and we all agreed to try to carry on with the day's plans and if it got to where Abby couldn't walk, she'd bring Sam and Kady on home later and Mr. Diva and I could take her to the ER at home. We had plans to build bears and eat incredibly incredible pizza in Springfield for Addison's birthday, dammit! Of course, by this time Abby was bawling that she'd ruined vacation and such. So Mr. Diva was consoling her. He said, "We'll just keep an eye on it. We don't want to let it get away from us and you end up with red streaks running up your leg. That would be bad. " Her eyes got big as saucers and I swear every drop of blood drained from her face. She whispered, "Like these?" Oh yes. There were streaks starting up her leg. I was so busy looking at the actual goriness of the abcess that I hadn't paid any attention to her ankle.

I placed a call to DivaDad, the family RN, who said, "Either take her to Urgent Care in Branson or head home and take her to the ER in town. Either way, she needs to be seen today." Well, imagine the tears from the child then. After promises to let her listen to my MP3 player AND the promise of just her and me going to see Nacho Libre this weekend, we managed to calm her down some. Not all the way, but some.

We packed up, checked out and headed across town to the hospital where we waited. And waited. Finally she was called back where they took her vitals, history and then told us they were backed up and to go back and wait. It was reminiscent of the indian clinic. We waited another 20 minutes or so and then they called us back again. She said there was one ahead of us and the doctor would be right in. We waited 45 minutes in that room. I can probably tell you everything there is to know about planting azaleas in the South and which restaurants to visit when you vacation in Tennessee. Back issues of Southern Living are life-saving sometimes.

When the doctor finally came into the room he asked a few questions, grunted at my answers, tsk'd at me when I said I'd tried to get the splinter out with a needle, then mumbled that it needed to be lanced, drained, and cultured. Abby began with the panicking again. He moved us to the procedure room and then took his sweet time getting ready, which of course, gave Abby time to panic more. My gosh, she needs some Junior Strength Paxil or something.

When I told him that I'd put drawing salve on it he went off, griping and bitching about it being a waste of time and money, it caused more problems than it solved, etc. He wasn' t making me happy. He wouldn't like me when I'm angry. He even got the little aide guy in on the griping. Grr.

Anyway, nearly 3 hours after we first arrived, we left Skaggs Hospital Urgent Care Plus in good ol' Branson, MO. We didn't see Hillbilly Mom's Dolly, but we did get a bandaid and a prescription. And I can help you plant your azaleas.

If you live in the South.


Melessa Gregg said...

I'm glad she's going to be OK. Our vacation wasn't quite that drama-laden, but that won't stop me from taking a whole week to write and post about it in daily installments.

We'll have to get to Branson one of these days. My kids love themselves some mutant vegetable.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Great Googley Moogley! That's one colorful child-foot.

Hey! The last time we were in Branson, we, too, ended up at Skaggs. We went at 2:30 a.m., you silly goose. By cracky, there's no waiting then. The ER nurses gave the kids the TV remote, seeing as how we were the only people in the waiting room. They even gave them pillows and blankets. I can't remember when we left, but it was well into the daylight hours. Oh...the reason? It was just HH, having a kidney stone. That man needs to drink more water. He isn't the first man ever to have a kidney stone, you know.

GERBEN said...

OMG! Talk about vacation from hell! Glad to hear that Abby is going to be OK. That looks nasty!

Queen Of Cheese said...

You my friend have experienced the makings of a Coach Family Vacation. I swear if it's totally off the wall, Nati will get it and out of town!

Kelli said...

Oh poor kiddo...glad that you guys had it taken care of though..sorry it cut the vacation short!

Anonymous said...

Poor Abby! When daughter Magnet was 2 she got a "thingy" like that on the back of her heal. Except it covered the entire back of her heal. It was horrible! Get better Abby!!!

Cazzie!!! said...

Fark a duck!! That's such bad luck for the little girl. I remember when I was a kid my kids brother stood on a box thorn and it got lodged in his heel. It was about 3 mm in diametre and 2 inches long!! My mum broke it off, a big no-no!! Then she tried to dig it out..then she put the Dr Thar's Drawing Ointment on it with a bandaid. He ended up in the kid's hospital the next day with the same symptoms as your little girl there. He was put on IV anti's , and the foot opened up under GA.
I guess it is why I wanted to be a nurse..he was always in hospital for things like this..aswell as asthma and croup.
Hey...what kinda cake is that you made there in the pic? It looks awesome and I have little miss Sarah's 5th birthday next week. She wants My Little Pony in it too. :)

Carmel said...

Sounds like the many "emergency room tours" we took on vacation when our kids were little. The ones with my son usually involved blood or broken bones or both.

Now an all important question from a Branson newbie -- we want to take our grandson there for a weekend (5 years old) Celebration City or Silver Dollar City?

I got your recommendation on the ER already :)

Redneck Diva said...

Melessa, oh yes, the gigantic talking mustant veggies are a must when you have kids! Although, I kind of like them myself...

Hillbilly Mom, my other two kids had to suffer through Bonanza because some really hateful nasty man wouldn't give up the remote. We'll make sure we plan the next one during the night. Sounds like more fun!

Real Kidd, it was nasty! And scary! She's doing great now, just po'd that she can't go swimming this week. :)

Mrs.Coach, that actually crossed my mind at one point - "So this is what Mrs. Coach feels like!"

Anne, thankfully it didn't really change our plans too much. We missed out on some shopping, but it probably wouldn't have been much fun with Mr. Diva anyway, lol.

Anonymous Magnet, hey, I'm not sure anything would be worse than when Daughter Magnet had the eye infection and was allergic to the ointment! That was HORRIBLE!

Cazzie!!!, we've always had good luck with the drawing salve before - I don't know if that was the problem this time or not. The doctor seemed to think so, but then again, he was kind of an asshat. :)

Cissy, Silver Dollar City has a lot more to offer the little ones. We really thought there'd be more kid rides at Celebration City. Poor little Kady (4 1/2) only rode 3 rides! And my sister's kids (7 and 8) were too short for a lot of them as well. So I'd say if you're going for kid ride-ability, I'd go with SDC.

And I should probably say that the office gal and the triage EMT were fabulous at Urgent Care - it was just the doctor that was a jerk!

Stacie said...

It seems you've passed on the splinter magnet to your daughter. I'm sure you remember that ginormous one in your leg from the old gym bleachers. Ouch. Poor Abby! I'm sure she acted a little more civil than I use to when I was her age and my Dad came after me with his pocket knife and a needle to dig out one of those huge honey locust tree thorns. Seems I stepped on one EVERY SINGLE SUMMER. Some times more than once a summer. Geez, you'd think I'd learn to wear shoes or something when I walked around outside.
"Heel" up quick, Ab.

Anna said...

Has anyone told you (no offense) that two of your kids look like a tomato and some sort of green cucumber?

Oh wait, I just put my glasses on. Never mind.

Stewed Hamm said...

SDC just opened half a dozen kid's rides next to the House of Very Little Barbecue. Granted, it's a sad imitation of Disneyland - complete with a teacup ride, flying elephants, and the like. but it beats paying out the nose to have your young'un walk around all day and only ride 3 crappy rides.

Assuming, of course, that Branson doesn't kill you first. That city is a black festering hole of evil.

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