Friday, June 09, 2006


And boy, am I glad. It's been a fast week, a good week, but for some reason I'm ready to sleep for about 4 days straight.

Lots has gone on this week. I have just hit the highs and lows with short posts here and there. Let me see if I can fill you in on the happenings, in no particular order or sense for that matter ....


Mr. Diva and I did manage to stay awake through all of Brokeback Mountain. Mr. Diva even stayed in his recliner the entire time. After the first uh, "scene" in the tent up on ol' Mt. Brokeback there I was nervously looking at him out of the corner of my eye, expecting him at any second to bolt, mumbling redneck things and such. But nah, he stayed hooked. He didn't like it, but he watched it.

I, personally, was very confused by the way the two main characters acted - they'd go from lovin' on each other one minute to knockin' the ever-lovin' horseshit out of each other the next. I guess there are different dynamics to a male/male relationship. No, I'm not making fun here, I'm really being serious. Men are naturally more physical, naturally more aggressive - I guess that's just how they expressed themselves. I'm just glad that my heterosexual man doesn't kiss me one second and black my eye the next. We'd be havin' none of that shit around here.

I found the absolute depth of their love to be so intense that I teared up several times during the movie. I, however, didn't like the way they treated their wives. Maybe that comes from being a wife myself, I dunno. I realize that they were living in a different time - a time not so open about homosexuality - but Ennis really pissed me off. Jack not so much because his wife didn't like him anyway, but Ennis' poor wife....

Anyway, all in all I thought it was a good movie, just frustrating. I wanted everyone to be happy. But I guess they made it very true-to-life because in my experience, life ends up with everyone pretty much being miserable.


Swimming pools suck. We decided this year to forego a 3 1/2 footer like we've put up the last two years. I just don't have time to keep one up, not to mention the fact that I'm overrun with babies - I certainly can't put them in the pool and I certainly can't let the big ones run amuck without adult supervision. So we bought the ol' $29.96 "Family Swim Center" at Wal*Mart (where my husband is no longer employed, ya know) and blew 'er up and stuck 'er in the yard and told the kids to have at 'er. After a few dunks the pool water was grassy and cloudy assy, so today we emptied it. HHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO DOGGIES, did that pool stink!! Okay, actually I should clarify - UNDER the pool did stink! Holy crap it smelled like crap! In fact, the comment made by Divinity Child #1, "Ugh! It smells like a rodeo out here!" I found it to smell more like a hog farm, but still stinky whichever.

So after emptying it, moving it, cleaning it, sanitizing it and then refilling it I was beat. Especially since my darling casino-employed husband's good mood has done worn off and he's now back to his usual assy self and we fought all morning and I cried all morning and probably traumatized Divinity's kids with my senseless bawling. Tonight my eyes are all dry and puffy and my head hurts and I just want to sleep. I swear that man needs a hormone patch.


Gotta shout out my niece, TotOne - HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! She turned 8 at 4:03am. I didn't stay awake that long to commemorate the occasion. Having been there in person myself 8 years ago it is still pretty vivid in my mind and I can relive it any time I like. 4:03am is not when I chose to relive it either.

I was about 5 months pregnant with Sam when that beautiful, perfectly round-headed baby girl was born. I was invited into the delivery room and Mom and I stood in the corner and bawled like babies as we watched her come into this world. She was Mom's second grandchild and my first niece. If you ever get a chance to just watch a childbirth and not be an active participant, I heartily recommend it. It's the most beautiful thing you'll ever witness. I've been in on three of my own and they aren't nearly as fun and a lot more tiring. A whole lot messier, too. Don't get me wrong, it's incredibly rewarding doing it yourself, just a lot more work.


Ever been so tired you can't settle down enough to even think about sleeping?

Me, too.


Tomorrow we're going to Branson. The kids and I are so excited we tinkle ourselves constantly. Mr. Diva hates Branson. Probably as much as Stew does. But this is his only vacation this year and by golly he's going. I never ask him to go with us. I did this time. He agreed amicably enough at first. Now he's pouting. He'd better get over that or I will make his life hell. Mark my words - HELL, people. He's going to earn himself a title of Asshat if he keeps it up. Grr.

There I go again. Sorry. I'll try to refrain from bitching about my own personal Asshat husband from here on out.


Anyway, tomorrow we're going to Celebration City in Branson and then Sunday we're going to Springfield to Build a Bear Workshop and Incredible Pizza. I love them all. I just love Branson in general, so if they had a Hitlerland I'd probably go just because it was in Branson and I. love. Branson. I hate Chuck E. Cheese with a passion and would rather set my hair on fire and run around pissing gasoline than go there ever again, but Incredible Pizza is like Chuck E. Cheese on crack and is so totally awesome that I well.....I *heart* Incredible Pizza. Because remember - I got Skeeball skillz.

I haven't packed a single thing. That's just not like me. Most trips I'm packed three days ahead of time and no one can find their toothbrushes because I keep snatching them out of the holder and repacking them. But meh....I am just not motivated enough to do it tonight. I'll do it tomorrow and make everyone crazy with me while I run around barking orders and starting our vacation off with a crash, a bang and a good threat or two.

All I know is my MP3 player is already fully charged and tucked away safely in my purse. If nothing else gets packed I'll have 50+ Michael Buble' songs to keep me relatively sane on the trip. I have found that if I cram the earbuds far enough into my ears and nod my head every now and then the kids think I'm answering their questions. I think it's safe to assume that the reason they now are completely convinced we're going to have them a baby brother is due to the MP3 player.


Ever been so tired that you know you need sleep, but you know that you really should take a shower and turn on the dishwasher and charge the batteries in the camera and double-check the back door to make sure it's locked? And you are exhausted - mentally and physically - yet you still have so much to do?

Yeah, me, too. But I'm still going to give sleeping the ol' college try. That dishwasher can run its bad self. I'm going to bed.


Anonymous said...

I LOVED Brokeback Mountain! I went with a girlfriend to see it, and when I got home raving about it, The Boyfriend's comment was: "Yeah, yeah, but don't you even THINK about telling me John Wayne ever did nothin like that!"

jac said...

girl you just slap RAWK! can't wait to hear how the trip to branson went.

Queen Of Cheese said...

Diva you really keep the road to Branson hot don't you? Seems like your always headed that direction. Wanna buy a vacation package to Branson that I probably won't ever get to use?

Kellyology said...

I'm that tired now, but I can't seem to stop reading!

Redneck Diva said...

Anon, my mom told Mr. Diva he'd enjoy the movie for the scenery if nothing else. He was so busy being freaked out at the story he didn't notice the scenery!

jac, thanks! I kinda think I rawk, too!

Mrs.Coach, will you take free cheese as payment?

Kelly, I know that feeling, too! And sometimes I can't quit reading simply because I'm avoiding housework! LOL

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